On the morning of January 14, 2018, walking the docks at the beautiful Queenstown, New Zealand, we passed a throng of young ladies. Obviously, they were the bridal party in jubilant celebration of an upcoming wedding. Yvonne quickly exclaimed, “come on, let’s get away from this gaggle”, and I gleefully obliged. Some time later, here comes the groomsmen. The groom was dressed in 1930s tights and dejectedly dragging a large ball and chain, shackled around one ankle. We laughed, as did everyone in the busy dock area of the quaint little mountain town. Fast forward to the evening, serene and picturesque, with the sun moving lower toward the horizon. We were enjoying an ice cream, at an outdoor table next to the dock. Nearby was an Irish Pub, which based on the voluminous commotion was clearly where the raucous bachelor party had migrated.
I had just devoured my ice cream, but was still feeling a little warm, having mistakenly worn slacks to dinner. I told Yvonne I was going to undertake the two minute walk back to our hotel room to change into short pants, while she finished her ice cream. I made the stride quickly and returned promptly in seven minutes and twenty three seconds, give or take a few minutes. Looking at Yvonne, I saw an unexpected excitement in her eyes! Exasperated, she immediately recited a startling tale of thrilling adventure that was the highlight (or lowlight as I would like to think) of her evening. “You won’t believe what just happened”, she exclaimed! “Right after you left, a guy came screaming out of the pub, running through the crowd with no clothes on. He ran right by me, not ten feet away, down the dock, out past the boats and jumped in the water.” Yikes, that mountain water is about 50 degrees, hypothermia inducing conditions. I didn’t know how to react. How could I have missed this evening excitement, just because my dreadful pants weren’t the perfect comfort level!
Certainly, I had no reason to doubt the factual account that Yvonne shared of the startling streaker. However, any skepticism was removed minutes later as we walked down the boardwalk and overheard a father uncomfortably attempting to explain the unusual events to his young daughter, probably about five years old. It went something like this … “Honey, they are getting married tomorrow. Sometimes when people get married, they do really strange things as part of the celebration”. Nice job dad! Thankfully, I never had to explain that one as a father.
Back to Yvonne and this dreadful situation … all I can think is “Don’t look Ethel. But it was too late, she’d already got a free shot”. According to Yvonne, she hoped his body parts thawed out from that frozen lake before his wedding night! I’m not sure what that means, but I am hopeful that is a sign that she was not impressed!
The photo here, an aerial view from our return flight from Milford Sound, shows a detailed scene of the crime.
